I have refined the being spaces that I am offering going forward: My new title is Sourceress Space Guardian, SSG. As such, I offer spaces for healing out of situations of conflict, making use of the treasures I collected during the over 20 years of my professional career.
My journey in the legal profession
My educational background is law. I studied law in Germany at the universities of Passau and Cologne, and did a diploma in legal studies at King’s College London. I finished my legal training for the German Bar in 2009 and handed in my doctoral thesis on “space law” that same year. I had worked really hard to not be a failure and get somewhere into the top 15% of law graduates, and I managed. I also put a lot of energy in my doctoral thesis to do it well, and finished it with honours, summa cum laude.
Yet that wasn’t enough for me to feel like I could make it in this world. I wanted to prove to myself that I could work hard in the real work life as well, I wanted to work on complex issues, and I wanted to earn “good” money. That’s why I joined a US law firm in Berlin in early 2010. I remember one of the first days at the office looking at the legal texts and books they had given me to get accustomed to the new subject I would be working on, “financial regulatory law”. I remember wondering how I got there and sensing that I was about to force my brain into yet another marathon.
I definitely got something out of my 3 years at that law firm. Towards the end, I felt empty, and totally disconnected from a sense of my purpose in life. I just knew life for me isn’t about working 60+ hours a week, including weekends, to only use my brains, and for which cause? I left that job not knowing what to do next. It was a courageous leap of faith into the unknown.
I eventually went back into a legal position, as legal counsel for a German stock corporation, and it felt somewhat “better”. There seemed to be more room to breathe, and to show myself. After another 2 or 3 years, I was back to the point of questioning “what for”? Why spend most of my waking hours at a desk, solving commercial problems, taking a certain position and defend it with all my mental capacity?
Guess what: I quit that job after 3 years. This time, I took a different leap of faith and moved to New Zealand. I came to work in an office yet again, consulting on safety management systems, albeit not working as a lawyer. My resistance grew and grew. Eventually, I quit that job, too, after “only” 2 years.
Discovering spaces of radical responsibility
In the meantime, since late 2015, I magically got entangled in a body of work, a context of radical responsibility. It supports human beings in feeling, healing, and realising that we are responsible for all our actions and inactions whether we like it or not. This kind of responsibility does not mean we’re to blame or it is all our “fault”. Responsibility looked at in such a way simply means that we create. We are the source of the results we produce in our lives. You don’t like the results? Well, change your actions. How? Make new decisions. How? Get new perspectives and possibilities.
What I came to realise is that while the purpose of our legal system – to provide clarity, “just” results, and a framework for our collaboration as human beings – are noble, it also serves hidden purposes: It supports the avoidance of taking responsibility. Instead of looking at how we co-create certain situations, it is so easy to go to a lawyer and then a court to claim our “right”, letting “father state” or the “parent” judge decide on our case to get the most out of it for ourselves. It reminds me of children fighting at kindy and then coming to me, telling me all about it, blaming the other, and expecting me to sort it for them. (Note: I am not negating that at times we may need to resort to that.)
Where in all of this is the underlying situation honoured as a treasure for healing, transformation, and our evolution as human beings?
Similarly, existing legal systems encourage large corporations to avoid responsibility by adhering to the law, yet finding the loopholes. Then it is arguably still legal, and in a sick way still screwing mankind over. Watch the movies “Dark Waters” or “The Rainmaker” if you want to get a better idea of how it goes.
Not to forget to mention how in our current legal systems, parents fighting over their separation can abuse their “rights” to play their power games while their children fall behind and are left with unintegrated experiences our society fails to cater for, because hardly any of the “adults” ever learned how to consciously express and use their feelings.
So, what is the alternative?
I had the honour of being part of a team that held space for a married couple, standing in front the shattered pieces of their relationship, recently. Here they were standing, facing each other, behind each of them a team of men respectively women.
It allowed them to share their innermost truths, their struggles, their feelings, saying what they need, asking each other what they need, committing to what they will do differently going forward.
Saying “I’m sorry” only to go back to old patterns is not enough. Feeling one’s own pain, taking responsibility for what we’ve created, and committing to do it differently, to get different results, is a whole different game. It allows for healing, transformation, evolution and empowerment.
This is what I am here for as a Sourceress Space Guardian, and not just for relationship spaces. I am here to hold space for the conflicts that you are ready to take to court. What you will need to bring is your readiness to feel and to take responsibility for your contribution, as well as your curiosity to commit to something completely different.
It is a bit like space law. In space law, there are no territorial boundaries, and everything out there is the “common heritage of mankind”.
We can create a common heritage of (wo)mankind on this planet by going into transformative spaces, where we heal our old sh*t and thus can shift into something more real, more aligned, more powerful, than before.
I offer navigation to such spaces. It starts with me, it starts with you. Are you ready to shift?
Contact me on +64 (0)272340054 or firstname.lastname@example.org to book a free half hour introductory session.