People without feelings do not exist.
If you don’t feel anything, it doesn’t mean the feelings aren’t there. It just means you‘ve grown used to not feeling them, to be numb.
People without feelings do not exist. Stop fooling yourself. Feelings are what make us living beings. They come as part of our basic equipment as human beings. Without feelings, we would be simply robots. But we’re not.
Having feelings is neither good nor bad. They just are. Anything else would be as if you were saying gravity is good or bad. Whatever you want to classify it, it just is.
We often have the perception that feelings are not OK, so we rather not feel them. We choose to act like robots until the feelings overwhelm us and „leak out“ in the form of violent aggression, overwhelming sadness, depression, paralysing fear, racism, nagging comments, or joy in seeing others make mistakes.
In the societies I have come across, children are taught early on that it is not OK to show feelings. Instead, they are taught to control themselves, to be rational. For example, it is not OK for a boy to cry (“like a girl”), or for a girl to be angry (“be a nice girl”). The older we get, the more childish feelings are perceived, and they certainly aren’t perceived professional. Even showing too much happiness is often labelled as “strange”.
Learning to actually feel lower intensities of feelings again, at a level they can still be handled without getting too big for us, takes a safe space, training, and time – apart from the choice of actually wanting to feel.
I’ve been in safe training spaces to explore my feelings more for 3 years now. I still find myself withholding, or trying to “make others feel better” when they show their feelings or emotions. Yet I have learned how the four feelings of anger, sadness, joy and fear serve me to lead an authentic life, and I have felt the deep-rooted connection and joy that comes from letting these feelings run through my system as pure energies. It is something that cannot be described, it can only be experienced.
Are you feeling the pain of acting like a robot, or are you curious of your human qualities and want to explore your world of feelings with me?